There are so many things I believe I need to do, that it's my duty as a blogger, but you know -- tempus fugit. Time is always the independent variable, and the clock keeps running even if I don't get to everything I should. These are some things I feel bad about and some things I do to atone for my guilt.
This Week’s Topic: Blogger Shame
The number one thing, that pains me is missing a publication date for a book I requested. Most of the time this happens, because I request a bunch of books, they don't come through, so I request MORE books, and THEN I get late approvals for a bunch of those other books AND the new batch. It's a simple case of too many books, too little time.
I do some things to try and atone for these transgressions. I will take out the audiobook, if it's available, and write a review based on that, OR if I am feeling really guilty, I will check the book out of the eLibrary, so some money is made by the publisher. I know. It's kind of ridiculous, but it makes me a feel a little better. (I'm odd)
I always feel guilty about not promoting a book enough too. I admire and bow down to each and every one of you, who are active on multiple social media platforms. I just can't do it. I am gone for about 12 hours a day for work. That is a big chunk of the day. I try to get out there on Twitter and Goodreads to say nice things about books I really loved, and I also will continue to hype them in Top Ten Tuesday and other list type posts, but I never feel like it's enough.
Finally, I feel really terrible, when I don't get a chance to blog hop. I try to do it every day, but there have been days, when my commute or my job just left me drained, and I could not bring myself to spend time on the computer once I arrived home. I also feel like I need to try to find new blogs to support more often. This is where it's tricky for me, because although I know this can't be true, I feel like the lonely YA contemporary reader out there.
I just hope all the involved parties can forgive me, because I really do love being a part of all of this.
Now it's your turn!
Do you harbor any blogger guilt or shame?
Let us know in the comments!
Maybe this is weird, but I feel guilt when I get a book for review and then my review doesn't get much attention because I feel like I've let the author/pub down :-/ I also feel guilty about not returning a visit for every comment I get, and so I end up pushing myself sometimes even when I shouldn't. As for release dates, I try to get my reviews posted in time, but sometimes things happen, and books always need promo, not just right when they're released, so I figure my review is still helping, even if it's a bit late!
ReplyDeleteI definitely share that guilt with you. I put it on GR, Amazon, the Blog, tweet about it, but still, not as much attention as I would like it to get. I was talking about that with my daughter, and she feels like reviewing on GR and Amazon are probably the most beneficial for a book, especially on Amazon, where number of reviews drives visibility.
DeleteI don't think you should feel guilty about any of these things! Blogging is a hobby, but I know a lot of us feel pressure. I hear ya on blog hopping - it takes a LOT of time, and sometimes I have to choose between that and working on my own blog.
ReplyDeleteI don't feel pressure, per se, but I feel like other bloggers and the pubs were so generous, and I want to do them a kindness in return.
DeleteIt would make life easier for bloggers if they got a quick decision on whether they are to receive an ARC, so they can plan their reading better!
ReplyDeleteIt would definitely be easier to plan, but I do understand, that there are only so many yeses they can grant, and they want to find the best outlet to publicize their book.
DeleteI also feel guilty for not supporting new blogs enough. If a blogger follows me on social media, I’ll follow them back, but I don’t always comment on their blogs. I’m trying to get better at hyping books I love. I just made a “Books worth reading” board on Pinterest, so that’s a start.
ReplyDeleteAj @ Read All The Things!
I am ashamed to say, I don't go to a lot of the new blogs, because when I see them tweeting, they are only interested in Wordpress blogs, and I feel like they look down on me, because I am on blogger. I have a Books I Read board for each year, and pin my reviews to it, but I am not sure how much traffic I get there.
DeleteYes! Like I am feeling so much shame for all the ARCs I got at the ALA convention last year and still haven't had time to read. Or should I say I didn't make the time I should have to read them. But I'm working on it. It is a guilty thing I'm trying to do better about not requesting so many on Netgalley and Edelweiss, and then doing a post about the books coming out this week that I kind of wanted to read, but didn't get around to reading or requesting. I'm hoping that kind of makes up for what I missed in the past. Great post!
ReplyDeleteI am so bad at reading physical ARCs, that's why I passed on BEA/BookCon once again, but EW/NG are my kryptonite. I have limited my requests by publication month. I wanted 3/4 new and 1/4 old, but I find myself breaking my rules often. I am still on top though. I am about 3 weeks ahead of publication right now, and I give exposure via TTT, CWW, and STS too.
DeleteI know exactly what you mean Sam! I feel like this too more often than I should because my life is SO chronically behind! I feel like book blogging is like motherhood! So full of shame and guilt LOL I'm sure all parties involved are SUPER happy with you no matter what because your blog is wonderful! being promoted here is a GREAT thing no matter when it happens!
ReplyDeleteOMG, yes! I can totally see all the analogs to motherhood. You know, I'm Catholic and from Brooklyn, so guilt is second nature to me.
DeleteI feel this blogger shame intensely. Although I am wonderful at blog hopping I am so behind on replying to comments left on my own blog. And I always seem to be missing publication dates now. There's just so much to do and not enough time and... I have no clue how to juggle everything perfectly. I just try my best and well, that's all really anyone can do :) You already read so much and review so much!
ReplyDeleteMy weekends are full of catching up, because I only really have 3 hours awake when I get home from work, and part of that is spent eating and whatnot. It's a struggle to make myself maintain a balance too, but I am still having fun, and that's what really matters.
DeleteOh gosh, I've definitely felt guilty about not getting to books quick enough or not promoting them enough, etc. I think most bloggers have some sort of blogger guilt, but I think we're (mostly) all doing our best so we need to ease up a bit. I love finding new blogs - and just blog hopping in general -but it takes a lot of time and energy, so it's hit or miss sometimes!
ReplyDelete-Lauren
www.shootingstarsmag.net
I think it's seeing those blogger, who seem to be everywhere that makes me really feel like I am not doing enough. They are amazing. And you're totally right about blog hopping. I love finding new readers to chat about books with, but the longer my Feedly list grows, the more intimidating it becomes.
DeleteI end up feeling really guilty when I requested a book and get approved for it, but then I start reading it and it turns out not to be the book I thought it would be. Something is just not clicking with the book, and I'll try to force myself to read a few pages more. But after I set the book down, I can't really recall what I read and picking it back up again feels tiresome. It's rare that it happens with a review book, but it does happen and that makes me feel tremendous guilt because I had though it would be a perfect read for me but ended up being kind of not.
ReplyDeleteI have been pretty lucky with the books I request. There have been a few over the years, that just didn't work for me, and most recently, I had the oddest DNF. It should have been something I loved, but the story was going nowhere (after 58%). I think I accept that there is an audience for every book, and I accept that I may not be the audience for every book. It assuages my guilt a little, when I DNF.
DeleteTotally understandable, I think a lot of us (most?) have some or all of these feelings. As bloggers we want to promote books/ authors we love but it seems like our reach doesn't go very far at times? Although sometimes I suspect it goes farther than we think, at least in some cases. Anyway blog hopping can be really hard to keep up with too- there just isn't enough time for everything and blogging is a pretty time consuming hobby!
ReplyDeleteVery time consuming, but also, rewarding at the same time. The blog hopping bit is what really put it over the top for me, because I feel like part of this amazing club now, and if you don't interact, you miss out on all of that. Which is probably why the lack of time for hopping frustrates me so much.
DeleteGuilt seems to be a constant companion of a book blogger... It seems silly though that we put so much pressure on ourselves. I mean, this is a hobby. We give up our free time to do this. We should be thanked for whatever time we can contribute, not scolded for not giving away even more of ourselves but it doesn't seem to work that way. The inner voice is always pecking...
ReplyDeleteI think you do an awesome job Sam. I know that most of our books/reading preferences dont overlap (especially seeing as the only YA I tend to read is fantasy) but you bring to attention so many books and authors I'd be oblivious to. Now, I see them around the blogs or shops and I recognise them. I may not read them but I'm aware they exist. That's got to count for something, right?
And I do read adult contemporary and you give me loads of those to add to the wishlist. :)
Awwww, that's great. I have yet to find a blogger, who 100% aligns with me, but I get something from every blogger I follow, especially because I mix age wise. I do skew heavily towards contemporary, but I get tempted by an SFF or mystery every now and then.
DeleteI also struggle with blog hopping some days Sam as like you commuting has me away from home for 12 to 14 hours! I just end up exhausted some days and can't visit as much as I'd like to. I think as long as we do our best that's good even if guilt is hard to shake! Sophie @bewareofthereader
ReplyDeleteFull time job + blogging is a lot some days. I feel you.
DeleteYou are not alone in your struggles, Sam! I relate to everything you've said here and feel the same way! I'm gone about 12 hours a day thanks to work and commute, so it is hard to do it all. Great post! :)
ReplyDeleteIf you really think about it, we are pretty amazing. Full time jobs + blogging + social media + blog hopping + reading + life -- that's a lot of stuff.
DeleteYou check the books out?? You're a better person than I am, if I don't get to an ARC I pretend like it doesn't exist. Haha, I think it's my guilt.
ReplyDeleteI'm trash at promoting too. I finally got caught up on cross posting my reviews and that is the extent.
I'm trying to think of YA Book Bloggers I know -
Morgan at the Bookish Beagle
Madalyn at the Novel Ink
I check out books from the library when I do have an ARC. I know! It sounds insane. I follow Madalyn. She's awesome. I have to check out Morgan.
DeleteI feel the same way! I have started to cute down on my ARC requests and it has worked out well for me. I still get unsolicited books but I don't feel as guilty about it as those that I requested.
ReplyDeleteI am only active on TWO social media accounts - my blog and bookstagram. I'm also out all day - up to 12 hours but I do listen while driving so that helps with the "reading" bit.
I've learned through the years that it's best to just wait until the books are available either as audio or ebook and check it out from the library or just purchase it rather than have the stress of reading it in time to review.
Don't feel bad, we are human, too!
The biggest perk for me, as a blogger, are the free books. I read about 40ish books a month. I could never afford that habit, and since I prefer electronic books (ebook/audio), the choices from my library are limited and the waits for new releases are months long. I have cut back on requests though, even if I want to read EVERY books, and I stopped letting the hype monster drive my requests, which means I am reading only what I really want to read. I just always feel like I could be doing more.
DeleteSuch a relatable post on so many levels. I definitely feel guilty every time I miss a publication date and when I get so busy that I can't visit blogs as often as I'd like.
ReplyDeleteI have been managing my requests much better, than in the past, but visiting blogs and finding new blogs to support is a bigger challenge for me.
DeleteI shared your post with my friends as I related to this totally. I am often filled shame and guilt if I dont post according to my blogging schedule or blog hop weekly. Well it can get overwhelming and it does often.
ReplyDeleteGayathri @ Elgee Writes
Thanks for sharing. That was nice of you. And when I miss writing reviews or blog hopping for a day or so, there's so much to catch up on when I have time again too. I am still love blogging though.
DeleteI have so much guilt with my blogging. I feel guilty when I can't read all of the books. I feel guilty when I don't like a book I wanted to love. I feel guilty that I can't seem to keep up with social media. I do have a full time job, and a family to deal with so there just isn't enough time some weeks. I try not to beat myself up too much about things and just do what I can.
ReplyDeleteI guess I have become very philosophical about books I didn't like. I normally can attribute it more to me than the book, which happens. Every book won't be a perfect fit. Time is my most valuable resource, and I am very thoughtful on how I will spend it.
DeleteFor me, the guilt piles up even higher when I get the eARC I requested and end up absolutely despising the book. There's only so much sugar coating and tip toeing that can be done to get that message across in the politest way possible :/
ReplyDeleteI understand people, who feel bad about that, and I feel bad, when I don't like a book I thought I would love, but I do not feel guilty. My opinion isn't the only opinion, and just because the book didn't work for me, doesn't mean it can't work for other people.
DeleteOkay so. The answer to this for me is yes and also no. I USED to feel every single bit of this guilt. Every. Bit. I would literally forgo sleep to comment back on blogs and such. But... this is not sustainable, as it turns out. Not that it abated the guilt, nooooo, it probably made it worse, because I felt like a failure on top of the guilties! But then... Idk dude, something happened, and about a year or so ago, I just started doing "whatever the hell we want".
ReplyDeleteThese days I really only get the guilt when it comes to other bloggers and not being able to reply and such. You, my dear, are a MACHINE- how you do 12 hour work days AND comment every day... I bow down to you. Because I simply can't. I *try* to get to at least my faves (present company obviously included) a couple times a week, and I also try to comment back when I can but... I can't let my own mental and physical health suffer any more.
As for publishers, I am pretty good about getting reviews up at least close to the dates? Like today I posted my overdue books but they're only overdue by a couple days max so I really needn't feel bad. But the guilt DOES still pop in from time to time- though I have gotten better at dismissing it hah.
Remember - I have no small humans to care for. That frees up time to do other things. I would NEVER have been able to juggle all of this, when my daughter was still home and I was teaching.
DeleteI feel that if I am within a month of publication, I am on time, but I still feel like I am not doing enough, since I do tend to read the books that are getting all the hype.
I hear you about not reviewing something on time! I have a bunch of ARCs piled up that I have not reviewed yet. I feel so bad that some of them are from several years back that it's obviously too late to even bother reviewing them. And I can barely handle my bookish Instagram account. It goes neglected a lot; I'm more active on my personal one.
ReplyDeleteI have a WALL of books from when we used to go to conventions, that have never been read. Some, I have read in eBook or Audiobook format, but that was way after the fact. I need my ARCs to slow down, because I miss doing my One Old, One New, which let's me showcase an old book with a new one.
DeleteI feel SO much shame over books I've won from giveaways and I still haven't read them yet. I actually limited myself to entering only a handful of giveaways last year because I felt so guilty I had won books that I hadn't read yet. I need more hours in the day please!!!
ReplyDeleteJen @ Star-Crossed Book Blog
I am SO bad at reading physical books, and though I was really excited to win them, and DYING to read them, they still sit. I have been very particular about the book giveaways I enter, and when I win book of choice, I request an ebook, because I am WAY more likely to read it.
DeleteOh, the blogger guilt/shame. Ugh. Well, with arc reviews, I'm requesting less and less so that's no longer much of an issue. But I do feel bad sometimes that I'm not some hardcore promoter. But it comes down to time. Like you, I am gone for most of the day. Between work and commute there's a huge chunk of my day. And when I do get home, have dinner, spend time with my husband, I just don't have a ton of time to blow up social media with promo posts. But I do what I can. Blog hopping is my main thing, I guess. I live in a state of being behind in visiting and trying to catch up. Between creating posts on my blog, visiting other blogs and commenting, and actually reading so I have something to blog about... something has to give! I could visit/comment every single day for ever single post, but then I have no time to read. I could read all the time, but then I have no time to blog. Gah! It's such a Catch-22. *sigh*
ReplyDeleteI have an hour a day limit for blog hopping, but with Feedly, all the posts are in one place, and it's easy for me to catch up on the weekend. I want to be able to do more social media post, but I cannot sit and tweet all day.
DeleteOh man, i totally feel you on this psot. I have been really guilting yself the past few weeks because I have been a terrible blogger. I've barely had time to post, and I've not been reading all that fast, and then I've missed blog posts from others because I've been so run down and it's all just been a spiralling mess. But I think everyone gets it, we have busy lives and so many of us work full time, there aren't enough hours in the day. We seriously need an 8th day of the week just for book and blog catch up. Whenever I feel blogger sham descend I always end up giving myself a little mental slap because I know no one is judging me and then I'll see a comment on my blog or something on twitter where someone has said something nice and remember that I am not an awful person and folks appreciate the work I do and it's all good. Like I posted a review on Goodreads, my standard word vomit of my initial thoughts on a book and Nick shared it and then the author commented saying thank you and damn if it wasn't the best feeling. I feel like those good little moments blast away the guilt 100% for me.
ReplyDeleteAnd that 8th day will be the reading day! I am definitely my worst judge. I am sure no one is worried about what I am doing. It's all me. Well, THAT's an awesome story. Absolutely something to feel good about.
DeleteThere is so much to do as a blogger. I’m asked if I get paid and some of my friends think I am crazy when I say ‘I get a free book!’ (As you note, they are not book lovers). I’m love them anyway and realized we all do our best. We just don’t always realize the responsibilities others carry in their daily life. I just accepted what they give. You are doing your best Sam - thanks! ❤️❤️
ReplyDeleteIt really is living up to the best that we can personally do, but I still always wish I could do more.
DeleteI'm a week late to this but I just am now seeing it and wanted to put in my two cents since I've only really been book blogging for about a year! Like you I always seem to request TOO MANY BOOKS and then realize later that I might no even be interested in some of them like I originally thought when I first found them. I think I feel the worst about that, honestly. I also do feel bad about not blog hopping as well but you're right! It takes a lot of time and I really want to comment genuine things, not just comment to comment, you know? Ever since I have started to branch out and explore more blogs recently I've realized how many great and friendly people are out there, too! (And that almost makes me feel more bad about not doing it sooner haha what a vicious cycle!)
ReplyDeleteYes, we are hard on ourselves, but I have to say, request regret is tough. I have gotten better at the number of requests, but I have also let early reviews keep me from reading the books, which then makes me feel bad, because maybe another blogger would have loved to have been approved for that book, and I took away their opportunity. It really is a vicious cycle.
Delete12 hours a day are HUGE. I only work in the afternoons, Monday to Friday, and I'm drained all the same. Of course, I have quite the peculiar home situation (my husband is partially disabled, so every job in the house is on me), but still. Oh, and I'm one of those people who can't function without enough sleep...so it's not like I can wake up early or go to bed after midnight in order to read/blog.
ReplyDeleteYou post an insane lot for someone who isn't home half of the time. And you comment - on time, too. I usually bookmark the posts I want to respond to and end up commenting in the weekends...maybe a whole week later 😳. Or I sometimes give up altogether because the post already got its big share of love, and I'm too mentally exhausted to contribute something meaningful. That's my claim to blogger shame, I guess.
Quote: "I feel like the lonely YA contemporary reader out there".
I feel lonely in my own way, because I don't read fantasy (or hardly any) and very popular books (not out of snobbery - I just rarely get interested), and I often read/review books after they're being out for years and everybody else moved on LOL. But I suppose it's useful in its own way 😉.
Time is such a precious resource, and you don't want all your free time to be allotted to something, making it feel like an obligation. Don't be fooled. I have a bunch of posts lingering in Feedly every week until I can get to them on the weekend. I try to respond same day to memes linked to a day (CWW, TTT). I know, it's odd, but it's a guideline. I may not get a lot of traction on reviews of old books on the blog, since I feel most people commenting on my blog are other bloggers (where are the power readers?), but they get noticed on GR, which is a place I miss a lot. I need to make more time for socializing there.
DeleteI think we all feel these, even when we try hard to let go of blogger shame. I knw I definitely always feel like I'm two steps behind no matter how much I accomplish---sad but true.
ReplyDeleteNicole @ Feed Your Fiction Addiction
Truth! I feel like I am always trying to catch up, but I am still trying, and prioritizing more.
DeleteI get it. I've been there. Still am. It's hard to fit everything in. I found making a list of ARCs I get by publishing date has helped me, so I can crack it open and do it, but recently I've fallen behind because of health issues. I really wish I was one of those people that can read 300 books a year. I always feel like I disappoint publishers when I don't review the books sent on time.
ReplyDeleteI'm doing a new thing this moment that I want to try. I am going to do a thing that features the 'new' releases of the month and why I am interested in them, specifically for the books I got for review to give them some recognition. I know it's not enough but I hope it is. I know it's different for booktubers, especially in YA. I've seen them get like 20 ARCS a month and maybe read like a handfull of them, and they continue to get them. I guess because they are a booktuber it's different, all you have to do is show the book.
I am always looking for ways to feature books I was granted early access to, because I appreciate it. I like a little spotlight like you are describing. I always treat my Can't Wait Wednesday books like that, but those are usually books I don't have. I think talking about a book on Twitter, Insta, GR, or you blog brings attention to it.
DeleteI totally get this Sam. I think we have all felt this way, one way or another. But, just look at it like this. The Publisher - can give away as many free books they want ESPECIALLY if it's an ecopy - without cost to the author - not shipping out printed books etc. We are their free marketing. We do all of this - read, review, promote, gush, etc for FREE. They make out much more than you ever will and lets face it, it sells books or they wouldn't do it. The only people I make sure their posts get up on time when they need it - is an indie author - they have to pay. Not these big companies that have and give out free copies of the books for free publicity. Just my thoughts!
ReplyDeleteMary
I think they do limit the number of eGalleys, but still probably less overhead than print ARCs. I just hate to think I took a copy out of someone's hands, you know?
Delete